Wow! It's been awhile since I last posted... Well my slacking only came from preparing Christmas gifts for family members and dealing with sick kids. Lot's of yucky sickness hung around during the holiday break. Total bummer!
Some of the major depression symptoms I had were: cannot be cheered up, loss of interest and pleasure in daily activities, insomnia, eating too much, feeling slowed down, extreme fatigue and lack of energy, decreased sexual drive, catatonia, decreased motivation, decreased task performance, withdrawal and isolation, loss of gratification in effort, lack of attention to hygiene and appearance, no desire to talk, interact or socialize; having very low slef-esteem, inability to think, remember concentrate, marked indecisiveness, recurrent thoughts of death; suicidal thoughts, hypersensitive to noise, light and stress.
Kind of long list, huh? Well they didn't all come to visit overnight! Some have been things I've dealt with for years. Seems like I am naturally bent to depression. Which is why it so easily spiraled into a massive depressive episode. I 'functioned' or lived in this for 6-8 weeks easy! At first is was just a few more than the normal. Then one day I woke up and only did things because my girls needed to be cared for. My husband and I discussed where I was emotionally and he'd express his concern. However, that didn't take me out of it.
I decided sometime in September that I was done being this way! I asked the Lord to help me dig myself out of this state. Let's be honest, I wanted it to be instantaneous. Like on cartoons and in the movies. However, depression doesn't work that way. So I focused on getting out more. Being around people more. Being active. Eating more veggies and fruit and less junk food. However, I didn't give up the sugar... Sugar is my crack!
In October I began working out with my Mother-in-law (MIL) and Sister-in-law (SIL) with a personal trainer. Our trainer, Jason, requires a lot if you are going to be his client. The first was to eat Paleo. He also has us working out that way too. So I gave it the 30-day trial run. What did I have to loose? I felt awful and hated the way I looked. Emotionally I was feigning everything. I'd smile or laugh when appropriate. It wasn't cheesy, just a mask so others wouldn't know. Very few of my friends and family knew where I was at. I was FIGHTING to not be depressed. I didn't want to take any meds. I wanted a total 360 in my life and that is what Jason offered. As skeptical as I was, I didn't have anything to loose but hope. So I took the 30 days and ran.
It took me a few days to get it all together and fully on board (learning curve). By week 3 I found myself laughing. Truly laughing because something was funny! Not because this is where I should insert laughter. Honestly, true laughter was something that was rare for me, very rare. So when I realized it I was stoked! Another drastic change was in my sleeping habits. I was able to go to sleep at a normal hour and sleep well. That was amazing! I woke up refreshed and renewed. Not groggy or foggy in my head. I had tons of energy and was able to focus long enough to use that energy.
Now you might be saying, 'that's nice, but it won't work for me.' or 'well of course you feel better you made a change.'. Well, it's from taking out all grains, sugar and the processed junk from my diet. That's the main part anyway. The working out helped too. I know it made the difference because during Christmas I had a 10 day period where I didn't really eat Paleo and added all the junk back in. Well, I started not sleeping again. Staying awake until 2 or 3 am easy. Feeling sluggish, foggy and out of it. Even noticed some of the depression creeping back in. Oh, and I was SO bloated! It was horrible!!
Once I got my focus back on the Paleo lifestyle I started to notice the difference. I won't lead you to believe that I've been back at it for long. In reality it's only been 5 or 6 days with a few little slip ups. Yet, my sleep is starting to regulate to a normal again. The bloating has gone away, thank God! My face has cleared up and I am able to focus! Let's just say there will be no vacations from eating this way again! It's not worth the issues it creates. However, there will be a cheat once in awhile.
